Soooo- greetings from the lobby of the Windemere Hotel in East Mesa-
Couple of interesting facts abou this hotel:
The pool/jaccuzzi stays open 24/7
Your key card can become unmagnetized if you so much as look at it wrong
There is a free breakfast buffet every morning from 6-9:39am
Also, this computer is an ancient artifact brought over buy the Aztecs.
(not sure about that last one, but the monitor is bigger than my house)
So, I began rehearsals for the King and I this week, and life has been pretty hectic and awesome. Nothing like the beginning of a new show- or as one of the other actors put it "the first day of school" We've been living out of this hotel for the past couple days- and I hate to say this because I'm probably the only one and I might be dragged out and stoned... but I really like it! I have my own room so I can talk on the phone and watch tv as loudly and as late as I want, plus there is room service- look, ok- I LOVE HOTELS!!!! there I said it. Certainly life will change when we move to cast housing. I hear it's fabulous; but I'm going to be living with all of the girls. FIVE of us in one house. I hope it works out. So far, I really like these people.
RE: the title-
Today, Red called me while I was out with the cast, post-rehearsal. "I have the most random and bizarre question to ask you" she said. Now, you have to understand, she says this in the beginning of about 80% of our phone conversations. The questions usually are pretty random, but- I usually prep myself for the absolutely bizarre (How fast do you think you would have to throw a cat to skin it using velocity alone?),only to be met with the mildly bizzare (What was the name of the movie where the girl who won the Tony for Hairspray played the fag hag to Scott Wolf and Jay Morr's shared lover?) (BTW that movie is "Go".) So the question: "How does the song "Quit Playing Games With My Heart" begin?" So, without asking why, I immediaely launch into the lyrics. "Even in my heart..." and I realize I'm singing at full level in a crowded Applebee's. SO I went outside, and together we came up with the lyrics to the first verse. Only then did it dawn on me that this is a strange situation- only after going outside and fully belting the first verse to a Backstreet Boys song did it occur to me that people don't normally do this. "What is this for?" I asked her then- and she told me why. Some of her servers wanted to know- It really isn't important. The whole purpose of this blog is to say that what happened here, tonight is why you have a best freind. So you can call someone int he middle of dinner and ask them for the lyrics to a late '90's boyband song and they will give them to you without asking why. Well- it's one of the reasons.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Here's what happens when the music stops...
That title is kinda dramatic, right?
It's like, the sound of silence and what happens inside our heads when we are suddenly faced with emptiness and what we do with it....
No- here's what it means. Wait, first, a story. While working at The Theatre, I was loaned a cd that I never listened to and never returned (ps, don't loan me things like that!! Even if I ask very nicely!!!) The cd was the soundtrack to a musical that I'd never heard of, called "Bare". That was January. I listened to it LAST NIGHT. So, the lyrics to the songs are pretty contrived. It's seemed kind of corny, actually, and I was almost, ALMOST disappointed until I decided to check out the musical online...And I read the synopsis. This show is literally the most depressing thing I've ever witnessed. Ever. And I haven't even seen it. Can you imagine being in this show and doing it every night? After like, an eight month contract, wouldn't you have healed over blade marks on your wrists from where you cut yourself so you could feel? (No, just me? Hmm)
Alright- remember how I used to be really, REALLY into the OC? I stopped. Now I'm into Lost. I'm totally into Lost and I swear to God- there is no one on earth who is as into it as me who I can talk to. Wait- I do have a friend who gave me this theory: "The island is another planet, " she said "it's in another solar system and that's why planes and shit get lost on it. It's being protected by NASA and that's why they reported all of the survivors dead".
To which I replied: "Hmm. Interesting." Dude- that friend is a loon.
Okay, so I have no other outlet, I have to get some things out.
1. I used to like John Locke. He was sagey and wise. HE knew how to do everything, He was the literal MacGuyver. Then season 2 happened and he went all crazy face about "the Island" and it's powers, and sacrificed Boone, etc, etc. The fact that they've finally consumated the insanity that is John Locke with the Others just like, made my life worthwile.
2. I'm really, REALLY over the Kate thing. Alright, already, so she's the hottest girl on the island. I know. I mean, Claire is pretty cute too, but you know- Kate hangs out naked alot more than she does. Anyway, she's been leading Jack on for three months, she banged Sawyer (which is understandable however skanky) and then she was somehow surprised that Jack took an interest in someone else. Hmmm. Seriously. Shut up, Kate.
3. If they kill off Charlie, the only likable character, I swear to God, I will lose my mind.
4. Whatever happened to the black smoke creature?
5. I love, love, LOVE the new and improved Sawyer. At first, with the stealing and the sneering, all he had going for him was that body..... which is fucking flawless, but whatever- Then season 2: he takes a bullet for Michael (the asshole)'s son, which is awesome- professes his love to Kate, (whoa), bangs that lesbian Ana Lucia (double whoa) and gets captured which brings me to now. I can't even say how fucking hot it was when he told Kate that she didn't have to use him, all she had to do was ask. Sweet Lord.
6. Jack: Asshole this season. It was getting on my nerves how fucking "good" he was all the time but, uh, please. Lets have some of the old Jack back. And Julliette, for God's sake? Seriously?
7. What are the Others? What are they? Please, Oh, my God, please!!!!
8. I'm so scared, literally terrified that they are thinking about pulling some Sixth Sense bullshit on us right now. Do not even think about it ABC. I know where you live.
9. I know about suspension of disbelief, right? But Hurley- lost weight in season two and somehow has managed to gain it back and then some. I mean, he hikes all the time and lives on fruit. What the hell?
10. It's been weeks! Why doesn't Jin know any more english?
11. Thank you, ABC for killing offf Nikki and Paolo. Burying them alive. Seriously, brava.
12. Did you notice that that guy- the one who interviewed Julliette and is an Other (and played the token Latino on Suddenly Susan) apparently hasn't aged in thrity years? He was like a jungle yetty in the seventies with long hair and then all that changes is- he cut his hair. Seriously not one wrinkle- what is that?
I think that pretty much covers it. I'm anxiously awaiting the season finale so I can have more questions to drive myself insane with all summer.
AND WHAT THE FUCK WAS WITH GREY'S ANATOMY?!?!
Izzy is totally out of her mind. I've decided that. How crazy-face is this girl? Out of nowhere- out of a drunken one night stand she's in LOVE with him? Propositioning him in the locker room? Okay and whoa, Alex! Who do you love? We know you have feelings for someone- but who is it for? Is it Ava/Rebecca- or is it Addison- make a decision and deal with it! Also- what? We waited three seasons for Merideth and Derek to get together so they could break up in two episodes? And DEREK FLIRTED WITH MERIDETH'S SISTER IN THE BAR!!!!! Is that the only place he can find women? And do all of his conquests have to be doctors? And is George leaving the show? WHAT?!?! Shonda, girl, please. If anyone should get the fuck out of dodge it's crazy-face Izzy! Better yet- Burk. Burk! That mutha-fucka left Christina at the alter? WHAT?!?! It doesn't make sense, none of it! Oh and they better not be thinking of introducing those five new characters as interns next season. I'll go gangsta, I will. And, you know what? I don't CARE if Taye Diggs is in the spin off, ABC, I ain't watchin' it. Stupid Addison and her stupid spin off. Fuck ya'll.
Okay- I know, I get a little too involved. Don't worry. I start rehearsals next week and I'll be away from my tv for awhile. I promise.
It's like, the sound of silence and what happens inside our heads when we are suddenly faced with emptiness and what we do with it....
No- here's what it means. Wait, first, a story. While working at The Theatre, I was loaned a cd that I never listened to and never returned (ps, don't loan me things like that!! Even if I ask very nicely!!!) The cd was the soundtrack to a musical that I'd never heard of, called "Bare". That was January. I listened to it LAST NIGHT. So, the lyrics to the songs are pretty contrived. It's seemed kind of corny, actually, and I was almost, ALMOST disappointed until I decided to check out the musical online...And I read the synopsis. This show is literally the most depressing thing I've ever witnessed. Ever. And I haven't even seen it. Can you imagine being in this show and doing it every night? After like, an eight month contract, wouldn't you have healed over blade marks on your wrists from where you cut yourself so you could feel? (No, just me? Hmm)
Alright- remember how I used to be really, REALLY into the OC? I stopped. Now I'm into Lost. I'm totally into Lost and I swear to God- there is no one on earth who is as into it as me who I can talk to. Wait- I do have a friend who gave me this theory: "The island is another planet, " she said "it's in another solar system and that's why planes and shit get lost on it. It's being protected by NASA and that's why they reported all of the survivors dead".
To which I replied: "Hmm. Interesting." Dude- that friend is a loon.
Okay, so I have no other outlet, I have to get some things out.
1. I used to like John Locke. He was sagey and wise. HE knew how to do everything, He was the literal MacGuyver. Then season 2 happened and he went all crazy face about "the Island" and it's powers, and sacrificed Boone, etc, etc. The fact that they've finally consumated the insanity that is John Locke with the Others just like, made my life worthwile.
2. I'm really, REALLY over the Kate thing. Alright, already, so she's the hottest girl on the island. I know. I mean, Claire is pretty cute too, but you know- Kate hangs out naked alot more than she does. Anyway, she's been leading Jack on for three months, she banged Sawyer (which is understandable however skanky) and then she was somehow surprised that Jack took an interest in someone else. Hmmm. Seriously. Shut up, Kate.
3. If they kill off Charlie, the only likable character, I swear to God, I will lose my mind.
4. Whatever happened to the black smoke creature?
5. I love, love, LOVE the new and improved Sawyer. At first, with the stealing and the sneering, all he had going for him was that body..... which is fucking flawless, but whatever- Then season 2: he takes a bullet for Michael (the asshole)'s son, which is awesome- professes his love to Kate, (whoa), bangs that lesbian Ana Lucia (double whoa) and gets captured which brings me to now. I can't even say how fucking hot it was when he told Kate that she didn't have to use him, all she had to do was ask. Sweet Lord.
6. Jack: Asshole this season. It was getting on my nerves how fucking "good" he was all the time but, uh, please. Lets have some of the old Jack back. And Julliette, for God's sake? Seriously?
7. What are the Others? What are they? Please, Oh, my God, please!!!!
8. I'm so scared, literally terrified that they are thinking about pulling some Sixth Sense bullshit on us right now. Do not even think about it ABC. I know where you live.
9. I know about suspension of disbelief, right? But Hurley- lost weight in season two and somehow has managed to gain it back and then some. I mean, he hikes all the time and lives on fruit. What the hell?
10. It's been weeks! Why doesn't Jin know any more english?
11. Thank you, ABC for killing offf Nikki and Paolo. Burying them alive. Seriously, brava.
12. Did you notice that that guy- the one who interviewed Julliette and is an Other (and played the token Latino on Suddenly Susan) apparently hasn't aged in thrity years? He was like a jungle yetty in the seventies with long hair and then all that changes is- he cut his hair. Seriously not one wrinkle- what is that?
I think that pretty much covers it. I'm anxiously awaiting the season finale so I can have more questions to drive myself insane with all summer.
AND WHAT THE FUCK WAS WITH GREY'S ANATOMY?!?!
Izzy is totally out of her mind. I've decided that. How crazy-face is this girl? Out of nowhere- out of a drunken one night stand she's in LOVE with him? Propositioning him in the locker room? Okay and whoa, Alex! Who do you love? We know you have feelings for someone- but who is it for? Is it Ava/Rebecca- or is it Addison- make a decision and deal with it! Also- what? We waited three seasons for Merideth and Derek to get together so they could break up in two episodes? And DEREK FLIRTED WITH MERIDETH'S SISTER IN THE BAR!!!!! Is that the only place he can find women? And do all of his conquests have to be doctors? And is George leaving the show? WHAT?!?! Shonda, girl, please. If anyone should get the fuck out of dodge it's crazy-face Izzy! Better yet- Burk. Burk! That mutha-fucka left Christina at the alter? WHAT?!?! It doesn't make sense, none of it! Oh and they better not be thinking of introducing those five new characters as interns next season. I'll go gangsta, I will. And, you know what? I don't CARE if Taye Diggs is in the spin off, ABC, I ain't watchin' it. Stupid Addison and her stupid spin off. Fuck ya'll.
Okay- I know, I get a little too involved. Don't worry. I start rehearsals next week and I'll be away from my tv for awhile. I promise.
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Just a week is all I ask!
So I've been 28 for a week and here's what I feel like-
I SHOULD be doing something better, yeah? This is my problem: I'm a product of television. The tv became my babysitter at the tender age of eight when I was plopped in front of it in the visitors lounge at the hospital my father was in. As fast as you could say "The kisses are hers and hers and his..." I was an immediate addict. It's where I learned about sex, love, relationships, my vocabulary, fashion, drugs, what you should be angry about, what should make you sad, what you should do with your life- the fashion labels you should be wearing, how to appear smart, how to make your friends laugh- It was essesntially my mentor. While learning from my mentor, I found out, that by the age of sixteen, you should have a really sexy, somewhat bad boyfriend who writes you love notes and slips them into your locker, makes out with you at the picnic tables at lunch, should drive a motorcycle or a really old beat up car (that he and his rotten old man rebuilt from the ground up) and is secretly wildly intelligent. After about a month of dating- he should tell you he loves you in this incredibly romantic way; and you should be thinking it too, only you let him say it first. Then you cry and kiss him and say somethng like "Oh, (boy's name here) I love you too!" You should also have a best friend who you tell everything to- you cry with her, she does your hair- and then you have a really big blowout fight with. And a passion for some extracurricular school activity. You should also have a political drive.
I did have the passion thing. I was passionate about theater. I did have a best friend- although i didn't tell her much of anything. I could have cared less about politics and I most certainly did not have a boyfriend- bad or otherwise.
Television is also where I learned about being a college kid. When you're eighteen, you should go away to college. It should be a long drive, but your parents do it. They help you move into your dorm, introduce themselves to your new roomate and after a teary goodbye, they leave you to your new life alone. You and your roomate either completely despise eachother or you become instant best friends. (the latter only happens if you and your roomate are from different races. As I am black, I assumed I would fall into that catagory) You drink alot when you're in college. Also, you have to become friends with someone who has a PROBLEM. Either she was raped or has an eating disorder or a drug or alcohol addiction. Whatever her problem is, you have to help her through it and learn a valuable lesson from it. You maybe rush a sorority, dependant on how lame it is. You absolutely must, must, MUST find a political cause to get behind, like Free Tibet, or the environment or women's rights or animal rights. You must demonstrate for this cause, either by participating in a sit in or marching or passing out fliers. This cause is where you meet your college boyfriend. He is sensitive and kind of granola-y. He wears hemp and smells like patchouli. He has facial hair and is passionate about his politics to a fault. Okay- either he is your college boyfriend or ideal-guy-that-your-parents-love-and-you-end-up-marrying is your college boyfriend. IGTYPLAYEUP is clean cut, gets good grades, probably plays a sport and wears dockers every day. He takes you away for the weekend to his parents summerhome in the country.
Okay- I went to a junior college that did not have on campus housing. I lived at home so my roomate... was my dad. I did not have a friend with a problem. I did not rush a sorority as the only sororities on campus were Phi Theta Kappa (the honors sroroity) and Lamda Delta Sigma (LDS for short, the Mormon sorority). Once again, I could have cared less about politics and I did not have a boyfriend, granola or otherwise.
Finally, adulthood. When you're in your twenties, you move out to a cheap, but really hip apartment where you live with a couple roomates. You are definetely best friends with one of your roomates. You get a job that turns into your career, you date a string of guys all with different genres (musician guy, doctor guy, guy that's younger than you, really funny guy, oversensitive guy, rich guy, et al). You have a fantastic group of friends who you go out with at least once a week and do incredibly fun things. You of course fall in love and get married.
The wedding is huge. Its the occasion of the century. It's perfect. All of your best female friends are there. You wear a multi-thousand dollar dress and your father cries. It is held in a church and a really old priest conducts the ceremony. There should be special appearances from people in your past who you never thought you'd see again, but showed up to your wedding as like a peace offering. Your best friend helps you get dressed and offers to help you disappear if you want to back out. You have an amazing band at the reception- where your best friend, of course, catches the bouquet. The best man and maid of honor give amazing toasts- and then you go away and change into a smart skirt suit-- and you and your new husband drive away in a limo as you wave goodbye to all of your friends out the back window.
Then you buy a house with New Husband. Then you get pregnant. Then you have a baby- who you love and name something meaningful. This all happens before you are twenty eight.
I think you see where this is going. I Barely graduated from college. My career is flighty at best. I'm not dating a slew of different guys. I do not have the cheap but hip apartment. I HAD a fantastic group of friends but as a result of some well placed misunderstandings, I do not. My point is this. I have no dea what I should be doing right now. Slowly, I have learned that all of the things tha happen on tv, in this way that makes you believe that it happens to everyone- don't always happen. Infact- they never do, to me. Tv was always this roadmap for me- this is what you do here, this is what you do here- and now- I have no map. I find myself stranded at twenty-eight thinking "Ishould have passed this place, this place and this place but I haven't! Do I have to go back and find these places or do I move on and find a new place; a place I didn't expect?" It's terrifying and exhilerating. But mostly terrifying. It's not that I don't know how lame it is that I based my entire life on what tv has told me to do, but I did. So, I'm lost. Not like "Lost" lost but, I'm completely disoriented and well, lost. It's like- I can see where I want to be, but I can't get there. Too many obstacles.
So- I should be there and I'm here. I'm twenty-eight. Where do I go?
I SHOULD be doing something better, yeah? This is my problem: I'm a product of television. The tv became my babysitter at the tender age of eight when I was plopped in front of it in the visitors lounge at the hospital my father was in. As fast as you could say "The kisses are hers and hers and his..." I was an immediate addict. It's where I learned about sex, love, relationships, my vocabulary, fashion, drugs, what you should be angry about, what should make you sad, what you should do with your life- the fashion labels you should be wearing, how to appear smart, how to make your friends laugh- It was essesntially my mentor. While learning from my mentor, I found out, that by the age of sixteen, you should have a really sexy, somewhat bad boyfriend who writes you love notes and slips them into your locker, makes out with you at the picnic tables at lunch, should drive a motorcycle or a really old beat up car (that he and his rotten old man rebuilt from the ground up) and is secretly wildly intelligent. After about a month of dating- he should tell you he loves you in this incredibly romantic way; and you should be thinking it too, only you let him say it first. Then you cry and kiss him and say somethng like "Oh, (boy's name here) I love you too!" You should also have a best friend who you tell everything to- you cry with her, she does your hair- and then you have a really big blowout fight with. And a passion for some extracurricular school activity. You should also have a political drive.
I did have the passion thing. I was passionate about theater. I did have a best friend- although i didn't tell her much of anything. I could have cared less about politics and I most certainly did not have a boyfriend- bad or otherwise.
Television is also where I learned about being a college kid. When you're eighteen, you should go away to college. It should be a long drive, but your parents do it. They help you move into your dorm, introduce themselves to your new roomate and after a teary goodbye, they leave you to your new life alone. You and your roomate either completely despise eachother or you become instant best friends. (the latter only happens if you and your roomate are from different races. As I am black, I assumed I would fall into that catagory) You drink alot when you're in college. Also, you have to become friends with someone who has a PROBLEM. Either she was raped or has an eating disorder or a drug or alcohol addiction. Whatever her problem is, you have to help her through it and learn a valuable lesson from it. You maybe rush a sorority, dependant on how lame it is. You absolutely must, must, MUST find a political cause to get behind, like Free Tibet, or the environment or women's rights or animal rights. You must demonstrate for this cause, either by participating in a sit in or marching or passing out fliers. This cause is where you meet your college boyfriend. He is sensitive and kind of granola-y. He wears hemp and smells like patchouli. He has facial hair and is passionate about his politics to a fault. Okay- either he is your college boyfriend or ideal-guy-that-your-parents-love-and-you-end-up-marrying is your college boyfriend. IGTYPLAYEUP is clean cut, gets good grades, probably plays a sport and wears dockers every day. He takes you away for the weekend to his parents summerhome in the country.
Okay- I went to a junior college that did not have on campus housing. I lived at home so my roomate... was my dad. I did not have a friend with a problem. I did not rush a sorority as the only sororities on campus were Phi Theta Kappa (the honors sroroity) and Lamda Delta Sigma (LDS for short, the Mormon sorority). Once again, I could have cared less about politics and I did not have a boyfriend, granola or otherwise.
Finally, adulthood. When you're in your twenties, you move out to a cheap, but really hip apartment where you live with a couple roomates. You are definetely best friends with one of your roomates. You get a job that turns into your career, you date a string of guys all with different genres (musician guy, doctor guy, guy that's younger than you, really funny guy, oversensitive guy, rich guy, et al). You have a fantastic group of friends who you go out with at least once a week and do incredibly fun things. You of course fall in love and get married.
The wedding is huge. Its the occasion of the century. It's perfect. All of your best female friends are there. You wear a multi-thousand dollar dress and your father cries. It is held in a church and a really old priest conducts the ceremony. There should be special appearances from people in your past who you never thought you'd see again, but showed up to your wedding as like a peace offering. Your best friend helps you get dressed and offers to help you disappear if you want to back out. You have an amazing band at the reception- where your best friend, of course, catches the bouquet. The best man and maid of honor give amazing toasts- and then you go away and change into a smart skirt suit-- and you and your new husband drive away in a limo as you wave goodbye to all of your friends out the back window.
Then you buy a house with New Husband. Then you get pregnant. Then you have a baby- who you love and name something meaningful. This all happens before you are twenty eight.
I think you see where this is going. I Barely graduated from college. My career is flighty at best. I'm not dating a slew of different guys. I do not have the cheap but hip apartment. I HAD a fantastic group of friends but as a result of some well placed misunderstandings, I do not. My point is this. I have no dea what I should be doing right now. Slowly, I have learned that all of the things tha happen on tv, in this way that makes you believe that it happens to everyone- don't always happen. Infact- they never do, to me. Tv was always this roadmap for me- this is what you do here, this is what you do here- and now- I have no map. I find myself stranded at twenty-eight thinking "Ishould have passed this place, this place and this place but I haven't! Do I have to go back and find these places or do I move on and find a new place; a place I didn't expect?" It's terrifying and exhilerating. But mostly terrifying. It's not that I don't know how lame it is that I based my entire life on what tv has told me to do, but I did. So, I'm lost. Not like "Lost" lost but, I'm completely disoriented and well, lost. It's like- I can see where I want to be, but I can't get there. Too many obstacles.
So- I should be there and I'm here. I'm twenty-eight. Where do I go?
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